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Meet Glenn Scrimshaw!
I guess I’m the writer of the Alienbutt Saga, War of the Coffee Bean and the Vampire Eloim short stories (yep more to come). Some people have been trying to claim I am an author but don’t be fooled. I’m just a drunken story teller that somehow managed to get a publisher. If you are into serious Sci-Fi and Fantasy stories then your Sat-Nav isn’t working right as you should have turned left at the last junction. If on the other hand you enjoy a bit of stupidity to enter your life then you may just have ended up in the right place, no promises though.
I was born and brought up in the heart of South Yorkshire and after a few years of moving around ended up living in Amber Valley in Derbyshire (For those not from the UK, near Nottingham, just think Robin Hood) After trying various things to make money I ended up writing a story for fun. Still no money, but man is it fun doing this.
Hello! What’s your name?
Hi, my name is Glenn Scrimshaw
What do you write and why?
I’ve write comedy fiction, the science fiction Alienbutt Saga and the Vampire Eloim short stories. I guess I went for comedy as I like to look at things from a different angle, to take a story and try and put a different twist on it.
Do you read the same genre that you write? Why or why not?
I read mainly science fiction and fantasy books, I enjoy the escapism of the stories. Terry Pratchett is one of my favorite authors, I love the way he puts everyday life into a strange and magical world. He deals with important issues such as racism and discrimination but puts them in such a way that they seem beyond ridicules.
What is the title you are promoting right now?
I’m promoting my first full length novel at the moment, The first book of the Alienbutt Saga, War of the Coffee Bean.
What is it about?
In the future humanity has entered space, and thanks to coffee (the most addictive drug the universe has ever seen) soon own most of it. Only the Ick Empire and the last of the Alienbutts can stop the evil Coffee Houses’s plan to dominate all of space.
He’s a totally new kind of hero, he eats junk food, drinks whiskey and has toxic bad wind. When you add his dodgy dress sense that does nothing to hide his fat arse you have Piestoff Alienbutt. The ex-taxi driver who finds himself placed in the center of events as galactic war breaks out and the only one able to find the cure for coffee addiction.
What makes this book different from others in your genre?
This is a hard question to answer, it’s a drunken mix of Red Dwarf , Star Wars and Hitchhickers guide. The story of a galactic war caused by drug addiction with heroes, villans and a central character who drinks too much, eats kebabs and can knock out an angry mob with his chronic bad wind.
What’s the story behind the story?
Alienbutt began life as a name created for an on-line game that developed on the discussion boards and took on his own life. A group of players began to post in character and so we each developed our own characters. From there I was told I should write a story so I took a few of those characters and began a story, posting it in a Facebook group and not thinking any more of it. The response was I should get it published so I went for self-publishing just really to have my own copy. I was lucky enough that when I put out a terrible un-edited print on demand version it ended up with a copy being bought by the owners of Gingernut Books. They saw potential and so I worked with them to make it a book worth reading, in English rather than whiskey English. I wrote most of the book with a glass of whiskey in one hand and just letting the story run the way the whiskey took it. I really class myself as a drunken story teller as authors are serious writers and I’m far from that.
What is your goal as an author?
I really just want to have fun and write stories that people enjoy and can laugh at, to be just a story teller.
Are you working on anything new? Give us a preview of what’s to come!
I’ve just finished the second of the Vampire Eloim short stories about a cross dressing vampire teen and also the second book of the Alienbutt Saga, the rise of Mr. Fluffy is all but ready to go to proof reading. Alongside that I’m working on another couple of short stories as I try to get ideas down as they turn up.
This is taken from a vampire story I’ve been knocking around with but it’s still quiet rough at the moment.
As she finally left the noise of the city centre behind it started to rain, that cold wet drizzle that seemed to get you wetter than a real downpour. Coming to the gates of the memorial park she decided to cut through rather than walk around it, a shortcut that should save a good ten minute walk. She justified this to herself by the fact she was getting wet and was hungry, she would be through the park in a couple of minutes. Adjusting the large handbag hanging from her shoulder she shoved her hands into her coat pockets and started through the gates to the park. During the day the park was a pleasant place where people brought the kids to play or walked their dogs. At night though gangs of youths would gather and cause petty vandalism but the cold wet night would have sent them all indoors.
Half way through the park she reached a section where the lights had failed, leaving the area ahead in darkness. She looked to the shadows cast by the trees looking for movement but saw nothing, so increasing her pace she started to walk through. As she reached the other side a figure stepped out from behind a tree. He was dressed as many of the youths seemed to dress, a dark top with the hood pulled up and trousers worn low to show his underwear.
“Twick or tweet laby!” He demanded, his words distorted, in the faint light she saw him smile revealing his teeth and elongated fangs.
“Pardon?” She replied coming to a stop a few feet away, nervously casting quick looks to the shadows to see if anyone else lurked.
“I swed twick or tweet blitch.” He demanded pulling a knife from his pocket while with his other hand he reached up and removed the plastic teeth from his mouth and dropped them.
“Just hand over the bag lady, you make an effort and try to be all festive like with it being haloween an’ all.” He left the statement hanging with a shrug of his shoulders. Lynne looked down at the plastic fangs on the floor in front of him where he had dropped them.
“So you’re not a vampire then?” She asked looking back into his face.
“Of course I ain’t ya silly cow, now giz the bag or I cut ya face up.” He replied taking a step forward menacingly.
“That’s a shame.” Lynne said sadly and gave him a big smile, making sure she showed her teeth and the fangs that dropped down. “For you anyway, cause I am!”
Who is your favorite author and what is your favorite book?
I love Terry Pratchett, especially his older work, his version of DEATH and the wizards at the Unseen University are amazing. To cut it down to one book would be impossible but if I could cut it down to anything with luggage in then that would be it.
Where can readers find you and your work?
People can get my books direct from my publishers at Gingernut Books.com or on Amazon.
What’s your view on the self-publishing/traditional publishing thing? Ideally, which one would you prefer and why?
I think self-publishing is amazing, it has allowed many writers who would have been overlooked by traditional publishers to be discovered by people. You keep total control of your story and with the growing groups for indie authors on social networking sites and blogs that champion them it’s the best time to get your work discovered. Traditional publishing is too caught up in itself and agents, looking for the next big thing rather than the hundreds of great books they never even consider looking at. I stumbled into this, without the whole self-publishing explosion it would never have happened.
Do you have a favorite quote?
“I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don’t know the answer”
― Douglas Adams
What is the most important advice you have for aspiring authors?
You know where your story starts, next thing is to work out where it ends, the bit in the middle looks after itself. Many stories remain unfinished as people don’t know the end of their tale. And for the love of your work get a proof reader, trust me you need one if only to confirm your work is the best it can be. The Grammar police are everywhere and can destroy a book quicker than you could believe.
Is there anything else you’d like to say before we finish up?
Just thanks for listening to me waffle on and giving a drunken story teller a chance.
Awesome, thanks for allowing me to interview you!
Please take a moment to visit Glenn at the links below!